So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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