Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
