glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
