i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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