it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
