Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
