How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
