We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
