Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
