There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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