I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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