yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
