I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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