no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
