this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i think i have two assholes
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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