I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
