After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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