There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
