I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
