shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
