We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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