Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You're a waste of cheezeits
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
