franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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