Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize
