Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
