shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
