you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
my shit smells like andre
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
