so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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