Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
