windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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