I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
