You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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