If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
ttyl tear gas
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
