I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I'm really busy with my period
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