great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
