So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
