I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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