When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
