You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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