I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
