if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
