More tranny stories later!
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
