I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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