You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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