Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
