Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
