Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
