I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
