dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
