she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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